This is a childhood story by Hans Christian Anderson. I am sure most of us will be familiar with this story. It was about a King who was crazy about new clothes and he would always spent on new clothes. And one day two swindlers came to him and said that they can manufacture the finest cloth which only the smart people can see it. And the story went on with ministers who went with this lie in order to please the King and not be viewed as stupid. In the end, when the King went around to parade his new suit, no one dared to say that they couldn't see anything. Until a little child said that he got nothing on him.
So what can we learnt from this story? We should be honest with what we see? We shouldn't say things that make us look good? We should dare to make a stand for the truth?
This story reminds me of the advertisement that featured a boy playing tennis. Though he is lousy but the dad only hears the good words from the coach's comments about his son. And there is another one that featured a lady driving horribly but only hear good things from the instructor. Am I like them or the King? We like to hear good things, good comments, encouragement and praises. A lot of time I would really want to skip the time of evaluation which will touch on my failures and weakness.
Who do we listen to? Do we prefer to listen to someone who always say positive things about you or someone who always say negative things about you? I am sure you and me will choose the first. Not sure how many will actually choose the latter. However, we do need people to speak truth into our lives for our own good. Of course tact should be exercised.
"Wounds from a friend can be trusted, but an enemy multiplies kisses." Proverbs 27:6
Do we really do think so? Sometimes I think I would prefer the kisses from my enemy.
We need friends whom we can trust to say things that can help us to be a better person, to be more effective in what we do or to do the right things. Do we have such friends? Do we value such friends and their comments? Or do we justify ourselves and criticise them for their comments?
There are times when I need empathy and encouragement; there are times when I need rebuke and correction. True friends will provide all these when I need them. Likewise, I would like to be true to all my friends.
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Thanks bro for this posting. The questions that you are asking are powerful questions which may be easy to ask but difficult to live out, even if we were to know what we ought to be. We need all kinds of friends and all of them serves different purposes in our lives. Some are more encouraging and strengthens our inner souls with their beliefs in us and words of affirmation; some are empathisers - they listen to us, understand us and identify with us, they make us feel like normal human beings struggling too in this imperfect world and journey together with us; some are more gifted, experienced, or more competent than us in certain areas - they help and support us by offering direct help or give advices to us so that we can be more equipped to serve; Some are there to point us back to God, to gently remind and admonish us back to God if our hearts have turned cold towards God. Be it in whatever forms our friends take, we would learn to appreciate them.
ReplyDeleteOne question I think is equally important is that do we ask the right people, those who are able to mentor and guide us, who are better than us in experience and depths of insight, enough questions to improve.
Another question would be do we really value their feedback by considering it through, embracing it and action upon it?